I have just finished editing the first draft of my current manuscript. It’s a massive milestone in the writing of your first novel process. A milestone I’m especially chuffed I’ve achieved. When I started writing the story, I knew my antagonist was a bad person to the core—someone who carried out despicable acts and lacked many facets of human decency.
I started hearing more and more about narcissists in the last year or so but had no idea how intertwined they were in my past and present life. I didn’t understand or comprehend what a narcissist was, nor did I know how to spot the signs, red flags, and traits.
My research helped me flesh out my antagonist, his character and traits and dig into past experiences with the newfound learnings picked up from all the material I had consumed and have continued to consume. The subject is vast and nuanced! Months later, when my character arcs were laid out and my story developed and evolved: the traits my antagonist had, coupled with his actions, stood out clearly, and now his trope and archetype were clear to see.
My antagonist is a charismatic abusive narcissist.
Narcissism exists on a spectrum, with different levels of narcissistic behaviour. Some people show narcissistic behaviours or traits but are not diagnosed with NPD – narcissistic personality disorder. Not all narcissists are abusive, but abusive people tend to demonstrate narcissistic characteristics.
I was surprised to learn that there are several types of narcissists. My research has shown it could be from 5 to upwards of 7 types. When you dive into narcissistic traits, the numbers shoot up even more! Narcissists share many characteristics with sociopaths. This is scary shit!
Narcissistic abuse is a form of abuse stemming from narcissistic behaviours. It can be emotional, psychological, or physical. This isn’t a man-bashing label. Not all narcissists are men. Although the ratio tips towards a higher percentage chance that it’ll be a man more often than a woman.
How do you spot the signs?
Signs of narcissistic abuse may include the following:
So, what do you do if you realise that your friend, partner, or someone you interact with regularly displays many of the above traits and signs?
NPD is a mental health condition and not a personal choice. It also doesn’t mean that someone is a bad person.
It’s also worth pointing out that everyone may, at some point, show any of these behaviours. This doesn’t mean that they have a personality disorder. I know my eyes opened wide 👀 when I read some of them, and I’ve had a couple of ‘oh shit’ moments…
For the purpose of my fictional character – my antagonist: he is a bad person. On this basis, my protagonist has to not only break up with him, but she also needs to run away from him – as fast as she can.
Sources 👇🏻
alwaystheother.com 
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